erm.
life is still e same.
bored.
n numbed
by e so-called assigns n portfolios.
carn c e reason y i need to do so.
weekend hmewk list:

elit assign
maths portfolio
maths extra qns
chinese portfolio
history thinking qns
hme econ portfolio
debate preparation
study geog common test nx wk
study history timed-piece nx week


really dun wan me life to be juz filled of work
n more work.
but sadly,it seems tt my present life is juz e way i dun wan it to be.
i really hate life e way it is nw.
i carn c e point in living if all it means is to study,
study n study.
seniors all said tt sec 2 is a relaxing yr n sec3 will be worse
can u imagine im alr feeling so tired in sec2,
hw am i ever going to cope wif upper sec stuff?
im nt stressed.
juz really dun like my life to be covered wif all my work.
its so tiring.
i dunno hw to describe dis feeling.
its like u noe u r going to skol,completing ur work,
simply coz u need to.
n nt u wan to.
its the mental tireness tt i carn stand it anymore.
n the worst tink is,
its nt tt type of physical tireness which u can sleep it off.

***
i dunno y i carn seem to be able to concentrate during pai ju nwadaes
ever since aft xiaopin.
im like feeling so xian everytime during paiju.
i noe im nt supposed to be feeling dis way.
but yet i carn control myself.
im really sorry to daoyans,
for nt giving my best shots during paiju
n doing so badly.
n im really sorry to all fellow yanyuans,
for making e whole paiju sucky due to my sucky performance.
i really dun mean it.
n i will try harder
during nx paiju
n everyone tt follows.

***
trying my best to make myself happy
n "un-numb" myself