two sided

im two sided
a fact which i juz realised yest.
one side of me is the cheerful n noisy talkative side of me
e other is the quiet n negative side of me.
i used to manage the two sides of me rather well
but ever since it happened,
i find myself unable to control myself anymore.
e quiet, negative side of me kips surfacing more n more.
i wana find back the cheerful side of me!
but it seem impossible.
the moments of quietness r spent tinking of tinks tt i shld nt even be tinking abt.
i wan myself to be cheerful
e side of me hu goes round
toking n joking,playing wif fwens.
i dun wana be to be the me nw,
quiet n isolated,
unable to connect wif ppl.
its like im feeling happy playing
den suddenly the other side of me will take over
n i will feel so depressed out of a sudden.
i really carn take dis anymore.
i tink im going crazy if dis type of tinks continues.
but hu can help me???
nt even myself.
its only nw den i realise,
im nt having mood swings.
but im changing.
changing into another person
hu is so strange to me.
i really dun wan the negative side of me to kip surfacing.
but i carn help it.
i feel as though my world is so dark suddenly.
i really dunno wad to do.
am i suffering frm depression?
am i gong crazy???